There are two kinds of people in this world. The ones who measure their lives in summers, and the ones who don’t. Since I can remember, I have been the former. Sure, the heat, the scorching sun, the “but it’s not fall” sentiment most share. But anytime there have been real moments of healing, change, and even redirection in my life, it has always taken place during the summertime.
Why? Why not in January, known to be a period of reflection, or May, when the flowers are blooming and serve as a literal representation of new beginnings? My theory?
The summer months bring an energy with them that makes most of us feel free. Longer and brighter days, more things to do, more people to see, more “opportunities” to finally do these things.
More time and space to pause and take note of what life has been up to this point, what we would like to take with us, and what we would like to leave behind as we move toward wrapping up another year of life.
And maybe that little bit of nostalgia or uncertainty is more of an opportunity than we initially realize. Sometimes, it takes being in between things to actually stop and take inventory.
Not of what we own or what we have accomplished, but of ourselves.
Who we were before this season, who we are now, and, perhaps most importantly, who we want to be when this season comes to an end.
And while summer may be the season that brings this to mind for me, the idea extends far beyond a few months on the calendar.
There are seasons in all of our lives. Some are chosen, some are unexpected, some are difficult, and some are exactly what we needed. Some leave us with no choice but to turn inward. Others push us so far beyond who we thought we were that we have no choice but to evolve.
Either way, they change us.
Sometimes they bring us closer to ourselves. Other times, they show us just how far we have drifted.
And the space between one season and the next can be an opportunity to notice which one we are experiencing.
Who Were We?
Before we can figure out where we are going, it helps to remember where we came from.
Not because we need to return to that person. Quite the opposite.
The version of us who entered this season had their own wants, needs, priorities, routines, and ideas about what mattered. They made decisions based on what they knew at the time.
Some of those things may still feel true. Others may not.
And that's okay.
We tend to think of change as something that we and others can outwardly see: a new job, a move, a relationship, a loss, a new car. The reality is that the most impactful change usually happens much more quietly.
Sometimes we simply start wanting different things.
Sometimes something we once cared deeply about loses its pull. Sometimes something we never thought much about suddenly matters.
And sometimes, we realize that the life we were so focused on building was built around a version of ourselves we no longer desire to be.
A truth that most of us might have to encounter more than once in our lives, yet one that may always be met with resistance—at least initially.
That’s why cultivating the practice of taking inventory can become so valuable. Taking inventory simply means noticing. Noticing where we are, who we are, and whether that is truly where we want to be at this moment in our lives.
Because it is hard to know what we want next if we haven't taken a moment to acknowledge where we have been.
Who Are We?
Do we actually know, or do we just “think” we do?
Do we actually know our likes and dislikes? Do we know that we are morning people, or are we just doing the 5 a.m. thing because that's what generally makes people successful?
Do we like being busy, or have we simply become accustomed to being busy?
Do we genuinely want the things we say we want, or have we gotten very good at knowing what we are supposed to want?
There is a difference between knowing ourselves and knowing the persona we think we are supposed to be.
And the former is much tougher.
Because knowing ourselves requires getting curious. It means paying attention to the things that energize us and the things that don't. The things we keep coming back to. The things we have outgrown. The things that feel natural and the things that feel like work, even when they look good on paper.
It also means recognizing that sometimes we can lose touch with ourselves simply because we are so deeply immersed in a particular phase of life.
And that phase might be difficult.
Or it might be wonderful.
It might be changing us in ways we desperately needed, or it might be asking us to slow down and reconsider things we thought we had already figured out.
Either way, it is worth taking note.
It may seem like common sense, but becoming so immersed in a particular phase of life, an environment, or, at times, another person can make forgetting who we are a very real thing.
Placing everyone and everything before ourselves might seem like a good deed, the “right” deed even. But in reality, it can become self-erasure.
The goal isn't to decide whether this version of our lives is right or wrong. It is to move through it while paying attention to who we are becoming, rather than unconsciously becoming the version we believe we have to be.
Maybe we are becoming more confident. Maybe we are allowing ourselves to feel more. Perhaps what we need is more structure and independence, or perhaps what we need is more support.
Maybe we are realizing that something we once thought was essential isn't anymore.
These are not necessarily problems to solve. They are simply pieces of information.
And the more honest we are about what that information is telling us, the more connected we become to the person actually living our life, rather than the person we think we are supposed to be.
Who Do We Want To Be?
Which brings us to the part that tends to come most naturally.
What's next?
Except I don't think taking inventory is about creating a completely new version of ourselves every time a season ends. It is about deciding what deserves to come with us.
Perhaps there is something we want to pursue more seriously or something we are finally ready to let go of. Perhaps we are in a phase we have patiently waited for a long time and, rather than worrying about when it might end, we want to fully enjoy it while we are in it.
Because reflection does not always have to result in change.
Sometimes, taking a hard look at our lives confirms that we actually like where we are. That the routines we've built, the people we've surrounded ourselves with, or the direction we're moving in feels right.
That is worth knowing too.
Not every realization needs to become a new goal. Not every season needs to produce a pivot. Sometimes the most intentional thing we can do is recognize what is working and decide to protect it.
And when something isn't working, taking inventory gives us the clarity to notice that too.
Maybe we don't need to become someone completely different to move forward. Maybe we simply need to become more ourselves.
That, perhaps, is what these in-between seasons are really good for.
Not figuring everything out. Not creating a five-year plan. And most definitely not deciding who we are going to be forever.
Just pausing long enough to notice.
Who were we?
Who are we?
And who do we want to be from here?
Because life is going to keep moving regardless.
Summer will become fall. One chapter will become another. A version of us will make room for the next.
We don't get to stay exactly as we are.
But we do get a say in what comes with us.
And maybe that is why taking inventory matters.
Not because we need to have ourselves completely figured out, but because the more often we check in, the less likely we are to wake up one day and realize we have been living a life that no longer feels like ours.
Reconnecting with yourself may very well not be about finding your way back.
It may simply be about taking the time to become curious enough to meet yourself where you are now.
On the cover: A true August sunset from a few years back 🌅
Question is...
Where are you currently in your personal story?
Most importantly, is it where you genuinely want to be?
Talk soon,
Yasmin Vasquez
Founder & Editor, Meraen Publishing
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